A Time to Remember

Yesterday was a time to remember. It was the one year anniversary of the day Mike and I found out our baby had no heartbeat. It was a sad day. Sad for my human self that I didn't get to carry that baby girl full term and for the fact that we didn't get to love her like we wanted to and for not being able to see Riley be the big sister she so wants to be. But it was a nice time for remembering too. For knowing that because I have received the gift of salvation I will see my baby girl in Heaven again one day.
To celebrate the day, Mike, Riley, and I bought pink balloons and released them. We gathered in the front yard (I'm sure the neighbors thought we were nuts), said a prayer, and watched those balloons soar into the sky. Mike said he felt like she knew we were thinking about her at that moment. It comforts me to think that too.
I think sadness is an acceptable emotion. I think it's ok to allow yourself to feel that grief for a time. I told Mike that yesterday we were sad but today, well it's a new day and hopefully it will be better.
Riley asked me the other day what Heaven will be like. I told her I wasn't sure but that I knew it was a wonderful place with big houses and streets of gold. She asked me "How are we going to get those new bodies anyway?" I told her I wasn't sure but that I was positive when I got to Heaven I was going to be skinny! Sometimes her innocence is the great comic relief I need. She is such a deep little thinker.
I am so thankful for a God that comforts and shares my joys and sorrows. I am thankful for the strength I have and I hope that the journey God has led me on will somehow be a help to others.